I meant to post this on my Birthday yesterday but Yahoo was having so many problems it had to be delayed.
As I enter the 34th year of my earthly existence I find myself very tired. This is the most overworked, burned out, and over burdened I have been at any given point in my life (thus far). This is due to multiple factors at work, Jess’s Wreck, financial situations, no real vacation for 2 going on 3 years, and the list could go on and on. If I was doing one or even two things wrong I could correct it but when all the factors start out as a little tiny snow ball at the top of Mount Everest no matter who you are when the snow ball gets to the bottom you are going to get smashed.
Don’t take me wrong I still love my job it has just been a very demanding year. You combine that with doing everything possible to assist Jess with her recovery and all the issues resulting from her wreck; it has made for a very long 2008 to this point. As Jess alluded to in her recent witness on the church website it has been very rough for us this year. I am not depressed, I am not ungrateful for all the Lord has blessed me with, I am just drained. The reason was put very plainly to me in the sermon this week at church when I put this passage up on the screen.
Matthew 11:28-29 (Mes)
"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on
religion? Come to Me. Get away with Me
and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you
how to take a real rest… Learn the
unforced rhythms of grace."
This awesome passage can not only be used for religion but also for all areas of your life.
So as I set back once a year to reflect and take an inventory as I often do for personal goal planning (just never published it), I have decided one very important thing.
I suck at giving my burdens to the Lord.
(Don’t really know if you can use those two words in the same sentence, but it gets my point across) Sure we all surrender some things to the Lord and some of us surrender nothing but the ones of us who are weighed down with matters of this world are not surrendering enough. As a very type A+++++ personality with a dash of OCD this is very difficult for me to do. I generally end up being harder on myself then other people, I always expect more from myself then I do anyone else.
So what is the answer?
- A 12 step recovery plan?
- A self help book?
- Run away from all my troubles?
- Quit my job and begin following my favorite 80’s band’s around to all the state fairs?
I say none of the above.
- How about spending more time in God’s inerrant word The Holy Bible.
- How about deepening my faith beyond my daily routine.
- How about stepping outside of my Christian "Comfort Zone"
- How about surrendering more to the Lord
- How about working on my Prayer Life (Needs a lot of work)
- How about taking time in my life to allow God’s never ending Grace to wash over me enough to slow me down a little.
Once you get this eternity thing worked everything else has got to be gravy.
To some this may seem a little too personal to be posted on the Internet, but hey I don’t care. I cannot be the only one in this world who has let everyday life that has nothing to do with eternity wear them down to a pulp. This life is not all that there is so why live everyday like it is?
I am still young, and there are still many more years ahead then there are behind. (The prior statement is both to the best of my knowledge and statistically speaking) These are things that I need to change now so that I can really live my life. So as I tried to develop a personal mission statement for this year, this one immediately came to mind and says it all to me.
Refocus, Re-Prioritize, and Balance.
You are only as old as you feel and right now for me that is not 34. It’s time to take care of this issue before it takes care of me.
